I was at church, but church was the middle school I went to. I was telling Sam how much I missed it, and then there was a show or a parade in the back field of little kids hitting the drums.
Then I go to the dentist. Sam is next to me, holding my hand. The assistants are unexperienced, and I could tell by the way they had to ask for help when he was preparing my novocaine shot. I hesitated a little but gave in. The dentist (she was a woman in her late 40’s, I think) comes and starts the tooth extraction, but when they pulled the tooth out they pulled out the gums with it. Still, I was a trooper and didn’t cry. I was just horrified by the sight and I still had no clue why that tooth needed to be pulled out.
Then she takes out a skinny metal rod and asks Sam to help her stick it into my ribcage. I start yelling at her not to, and tried to push it out of her hands. They have trouble penetrating my skin because the rod was blunt, but they manage to shove it in anyways. It hurts so bad I can barely speak. The blood, mixed with sweat, is all over my clothes. I just have my mouth open in shock… and pain. She leaves the rod in my ribcage, twirls it, and leaves it in for what felt like 5 more minutes, and takes it out. I start crying and Sam is trying to comfort me.
Let’s just say I postponed my test about 3 times, and when I actually went to take it.. I slept through 2 sections. I didn’t do so hot. I didn’t even bother taking it again cause sitting through that test is just inhumane.
I remember telling myself a few years ago not to make any memories I would miss, because it was always memories that would hold me back. Making memories with you, as happy as it makes me feel, it terrifies me. If something ever happens to us, I know days like today will replay in my mind and it might really screw me up this time.
It changes. All the time. If I want something carbonated, it would be a Pepsi with lime. If I want something lemon-y, it would be either mango or raspberry lemonade. I like cranberry juice, especially the cranberry-apple-raspberry one. I love grace juice too. I like Gatorade, preferably blue. Sometimes I really just want ice cold water. I’m not really a tea person, but I do drink a lot of green tea…
If I had to choose, I guess it would be Pepsi with lime. That’s what I usually get. LOL. So unhealthy, but whatever. At least I’m not addicted to RedBull anymore. (Permanent rapid heartbeat. I was humbled.)
I think my dad would do a better job at figuring out his daughter if he just had a conversation with me instead of finding ways to trick me into admitting things I’m not guilty of. It’s getting old and a little insulting.